Our week in review!

Greetings from KC!  I hope that those reading this are having a WONDERFUL Sunday.  I have found that I actually have a little bit of time today to do whatever I want, so I thought that I would write a little to tell you what we have been up to lately.

As I type this every member of my family is watching something different on EVERYONE of our T.v.s.  Jeff is catching up on golf, E is watching X-games, Carleigh is watching the Cake Boss (she loves cooking shows like her momma) and Miss D is watching some goofy movie that we rented for her this week.  It’s a good thing that Sunday is a day of rest, because it looks like that’s what everyone will be doing for the rest of the day.

I have to tell you that today’s service at Sheffield was da bomb!!  Our Pastor is out of town and so one of our other Pastors “threw down” the word.  What I liked about it especially is that he called sin what it is “SIN”.  He didn’t sugar coat it, he wasn’t worried about being politically correct, he just said it like it is in the Word.  Awesome job Pastor Ray!  PREACH!

The last few weeks of summer break seem to be flying by.  I’m trying really hard to get everything done with the kiddos that I wanted to.  I’m going to try to fit in a few more play dates, a trip to World’s of Fun, and maybe a trip to Wonderscope before they go back.  I have also been busy buying school clothes and supplies.  Can I just tell you that I'm going to go BROKE when I have three kiddos in school?  Why does it seem like I’m buying enough supplies for ever child in the class?  I know that they need the supplies but DANG, I’m feeling pretty cheap about it these days.  When I pick it up at the store I calculate the total in my head and wonder if I’m done yet.  I’m almost done and I’m going to be so glad when I can mark that off of my “to do” list.

Do you make “to do” lists?  I am a faithful list maker.  I love to make lists.  Christmas lists, grocery lists, home to do lists, honey-do lists, budget lists.  I have them all over the house.  It’s funny to find them from a few years back and see what I was “listing” about at the time and see what and where we’ve came from.  I love the feeling of accomplishing whatever was on my lists.  Do you know what I do when my list is all checked off?  Make another list!!!  I’m crazy like that.

So, the last time I wrote I had you pray about Emmitt and Carleigh’s tuition for school, and for our Medical Bills.  Although no money happened to drop from the sky, Jeff was asked to work a few extra hours for the next 6-8 weeks to help out at his part-time job.  With the extra money that he potentially could earn, we will hopefully be able to pay off the rest of what we owe for Carleigh’s tuition and pay off the rest of our Doctor bills.  Praise God.  It is a sacrifice for all of us for him to be gone, but we thankfully accept the opportunity that God has given our family. Who couldn’t use a little extra cash these days?

All of this money talk has been majorly stressing me out.  I know that I’m a Christian, I know what the Word says about God taking care of me, but I have still been stressing.  I’m just being brutally honest and letting you know that sometimes you just don’t feel like believing what the Word says.  And then something happens, a gentle nudge from God and you think to yourself, “All right, I’m wrong, I admit it, I know that you will take care of my every need if I just TRUST you”.  Trust is a huge thing for me right now.  I trusted with every pregnancy that my babies would be healthy and that I would get to watch them grow up.  I just knew with loosing Jordan, and then Mia, and the Elijah that that baby would be our testimony.  Although the outcome is certainly not at all what I had envisioned, I still feel that gentle nudge from God telling me just TRUST Him. 

I have been crying a lot over this past week.  I guess that it’s part of the grieving process. I cannot believe that it’s August already.  This is the month that he was supposed to be born.  This is the month that we talked about in December, January, February, March and April.  We planned on having him a little early so I would have a few days home from the hospital before the kids started school.  I knew that August was coming, but when I got on my computer yesterday morning and saw that it was August 1, I felt like someone kicked me in the stomach. Yet another reminder that we lost him.  He’s not coming this month, I’m no longer pregnant, and I will not get to see him grow up.  I’m usually a pretty positive person but there is nothing good about that.  It’s hard to see the “up”side for the whole situation. That’s just where I'm at right now.  And I’ll go ahead and tell you that it’s probably going to get worse before it better.  I miss that little guy and all the hopes that we had for him.

My wonderful mother-in-law has decided to do something that will bless others that ever have to go through this.  She is crocheting teeny tiny little blankets for the hospitals.  She’s calling it “Nana’s HOPE”.  Her hope is that people that have to give birth to a dead child, or even one that is only alive for a few minutes or hours, will know that they are not alone.  There is still HOPE in the midst of every situation.  I’m going to type something up with a scripture about HOPE on it and deliver it to the hospitals.  I’ll post a picture when I start receiving the blankets.  I know that I cherish the ones that we have when we had Mia and Elijah. 

I’ve been reading a little about what it would take to be a writer.  My sis and I have always said that we would love to write a book.  A couple years ago, I thought that it could possibly be a children's book.  Now I’m thinking about writing an article about what we’ve been through in the past few years and submitting it to some magazines.  Ya all know I could write a book about what NOT to say to people when they miscarry a child.  We’ll see what happens.  I’m just trying to start making dreams and goals again.  My hope is that it might help just one person to know that they are not alone.

I guess that’s all for now folks.  My family has decided that they want breakfast for supper tonight.  I’m making Banana’s Foster French Toast, Eggs, Sausage, Bacon and Biscuits! YUM-O!  Have to get started on it!  So much for a little time off!  Such is the life of a mommy.

Have a great week!

Marsha